I have friends who are Afghan who have had arranged marriages so this led me to be curious to ask, why does this practice still persist into the 21st century?

  • fine_sandy_bottom@discuss.tchncs.de
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    6 months ago

    Sheesh. There’s a lot of weird ideas in this thread.

    I made a lot of mistakes in my teens and 20s, including but not limited to my poor choices in romantic partners.

    If it was culturally appropriate, it would’ve been great to have some help.

        • silly goose meekah@lemmy.world
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          6 months ago

          I mean, yeah, but what’s the point of calling something an arranged marriage when it’s actually just parents acting as an old school dating app

            • silly goose meekah@lemmy.world
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              6 months ago

              But then it’s still just arranged dating at best. Maybe the parents look for someone who is interested in entering a marriage in the first place, but that doesn’t make it an arranged marriage IMO.

              • Devi@kbin.social
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                6 months ago

                It’s not dating exactly, but there are dates involved. The parents pick someone that you’re intended to marry, they bring them round and go “here, we think you should marry this person”. You get chatting with them, go out for some dates, in the modern age you’re probably texting each other etc, but it’s not like western dating where you’re just seeing how it goes, you’re deciding if you want to marry.

                After a short while you would say ‘yup, this seems good’.

                • silly goose meekah@lemmy.world
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                  6 months ago

                  I mean I’m aware that this isn’t like western dating but it’s still not an arranged marriage. Saying that this is an arranged marriage is like having your parents pick out a hairdresser and calling it a haircut.

                • silly goose meekah@lemmy.world
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                  6 months ago

                  Yes, language is subjective, cool that you seem to be learning that today. So no argument as to why it would actually be an arranged marriage, despite the described scenario not necessarily ending in a marriage?

                  • fine_sandy_bottom@discuss.tchncs.de
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                    6 months ago

                    Sorry mate. You don’t seem very bright. If you look back through this comment thread you’re the only one talking about dating and whatever. I said it’s subjective several comments ago.

    • BruceTwarzen@kbin.social
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      6 months ago

      It’s nice when you get some help, but ihelp in the form of aomeone being forced to be your little house slave is weird as shit

      • fine_sandy_bottom@discuss.tchncs.de
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        6 months ago

        aomeone being forced

        That’s the thing though. An arranged marriage is not necessarily a forced marriage. If everyone is an enthusiastic participant then where’s the harm?

        • AA5B@lemmy.world
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          6 months ago

          I didn’t grow up in one of those cultures, but agree, there could be advantages. Notably, younger people are likely to focus on physical attraction, whereas marriage is a life long partnership that requires a lot more. Family can step back a little to pay attention to other compatibilities. Family can start from a position of knowing both participants, rather than meeting someone completely unknown. I don’t know how it usually works, but it could. As long as it’s not forced, the goals are for the peoples happiness, the participants have a veto, I can definitely see advantages.

          As a nerdy, introverted, shy, guy, bring it on. I have plenty to bring to a relationship, but not in finding someone to relate to