US, Egypt, Qatar, and every sane nation: Let’s end this war now.

Hamas: We’ll give Israel everything they want if they will end the war.

Israel: Fuck you. Give us everything we want, and we’ll still kill you all.

US and Israel: We’re not sure why Hamas is being so unreasonable, but it looks like no ceasefire.

Midichlorians… Midichlorians everywhere

I’m always seeing posts and comments from that one guy everybody secretly doesn’t like. Man, I hate that guy.

Given Russia’s performance in Ukraine, Iran firing 5% of its total stockpile at Israel and having almost nothing get through modern American air defense, and China’s own review of military readiness that showed glaring flaws and corruption, any plans China may have had to invade Taiwan should be postponed indefinitely.

Turning local elections in Taiwan in China’s favor in the long term seems like the more viable alternative for reunification.

Routine trip. If the USN wanted to send a message, it would have sent a carrier group.

Often caused by an imbalance in brain chemicals, which can be corrected with medicine.

Get diagnosed and take your meds. It’s a world of difference.

Tech company creates best search engine —-> world domination —> becomes VC company in tech trench coat —-> destroy search engine to prop up bad investments in artificial intelligence advanced chatbots

Billions and billions invested to produce accuracy slightly less than flipping a coin.

The problem with peaceful protests is that they attract violent people who attack them. So, TPTB ban the peaceful protestors.

What happens if a select few of the peaceful protestors happened to be armed in places where doing so publicly is legal? The peaceful protestors are protected from violence by a select few exercising their second amendment right to bear arms. Pretty hard to ban those peaceful protestors.

Works on my machine.

orgy etiquette host or group cleans up

At first, they denied it—“OpenAI chief technology officer Mira Murati said the company did not pattern any ChatGPT voices on Johansson’s sultry computer voice in the movie,” but Altman and other OpenAI guys had let the cat out the bag on Twitter

They’re not just deliberately using her voice; they’re deliberately lying about it and bragging about what really happened in public. They’ll pay some nuisance settlement that’s a small fraction of their profit.

That’s how they treat an a list actress. Imagine how they treat everyone else. You don’t get a settlement. You just get fucked.

They would have won even more championships if Shaq hadn’t insisted on eating non-halal meat during team meetings. You could cut the tension with a knife.

Would you agree that Bobby Kennedy would draw more voters from Trump as it stands?

A “conspiracy theorist” is rejected on the left until government-sanctioned evidence is provided. The right doesn’t have that constraint.

Does everyone hate Bobby Kennedy so much that they’ll side with Facebook and Zuckerberg over a career environmental attorney because he’s running for president?

“Not my big boat penis!” yelled the oligarch who got tens of thousands of Russians killed by siphoning gas and stealing tank parts to sell on the black market to buy said boat penis (probably).

This should not have happened. Google Cloud has identified the events that led to this disruption and taken measures to ensure this does not happen again.”

Our AI golem destroyed something important again, but we’re too big to fail so our mistakes don’t matter.

We promise it won’t happen again, but when it does happen again, it still won’t matter.

We’re a totally safe and responsible company and should be trusted with most of the world’s data management.

The intentionally-created famine and water shortage may be the worst war crime of all. There aren’t enough bombs to kill everyone, but starvation and thirst will.

Human beings should not be treated this way. At least allow humanitarian aide in for innocent civilians. Children.

You see, our stock price goes up when we buy other companies and it goes up when we fire people. We’re doing both at the same time, so our stock price will go up double. This is a sustainable business model and not at all a very dead canary in a very deadly coal mine.

Maybe it’s methane release. Maybe it’s gasses from the sea floor we knew nothing about. We have no fucking clue what climate change is going to look like. PR firms told scientists to put the lowest projections in press releases for the last decade. The real numbers are both grim and proving to be optimistic.

As it turns out, the math was all wrong. Who knows why? Maybe all the Earth’s various systems are interrelated, and when one system collapses it causes dozens of other systems to collapse. Maybe Earth and the delicate balance that enabled life to grow on this planet is a little more sensitive to sudden, radical change than we thought.

Maybe all the people who lied about climate change since the 1970s lied about more shit we’re going to find out about shortly now that we can’t stop it from happening. But they’ll still make their profits and get their taxpayer-funded subsidies, so capitalism is working as intended.