Most of my friends already know to be careful if I call something mild, but it’s always fun to see the reaction of those who don’t.

I have found an easy method to avoid such blunders. I simply never leave my house.

Usually quickly followed by “Oh shit wasn’t there something I was supposed to do today.”

*dissolves into nothing after being sprayed*

Never had the violet one. Wonder if it would be worth the cannibalism.

I can’t really speak up if I have something wrong but if my friend has and can’t it’s suddenly no problem for me

A family that conquers together, stays together Ɛ>.

Jason is about to learn how it feels to be hunted

At this point I’m pretty sure that every delivery driver for my street has seen me in my bathrobe

Me day to day

I am reading this at 3 am and I feel called out.

The only thing wrong here is the milk being poured first.

Ok, show of hands; who else recognized that door immediately.🤚

Brain so smooth, the car crash simply slides right off.

Sounds like a great time and there is someone already there ready to greet you

And i love all of them ❤️