I’m doing the driving lessons and I dread them every time. I don’t feel like I’m improving much and it’s just stressful. I feel like giving up. I’m only going because I passed the theory exam with that school, and i would had to spend more money (that I don’t have) if I start again with other school, basically I’m too deep into it to stop.

Btw I now understand the hate towards manual cars. Automatic should be the only option, one less BIG distraction on the road, especially when you’re new on these things, being too soft or too rough on the clutch is a matter of millimeters is ridiculous, watching the road, the signs, the traffic lights, the cars around you, the stupid people with their bikes, while fumbling in the car with the pedals is the worst… (unfortunately you must learn manual where I’m living).

  • Flax@feddit.uk
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    3 days ago

    It took me a year worth of lessons every week and constant practice, and I passed. I’m a pretty decent driver now. Manual is better because it doesn’t change gear when I don’t ask it to. Here you can pass a driving test with an automatic, but if you do, you’re not licenced to drive a manual

  • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet@lemmy.world
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    20 days ago

    Btw I now understand the hate towards manual cars. Automatic should be the only option

    This is a big problem with people these days. You admitted you suck at driving, you’re just barely learning how to do it, but you think you’re qualified to mandate what is available to everyone else? You do not have enough experience to have an opinion that affects other people. Stick shift is completely intuitive when you know how to do it.

    • Not OP, not a bad driver, have a class A (used to drive a school bus), and can drive stick.

      I still think automatic is safer just on the merit of being less to think about. Especially when you have an extra large vehicle filled with kids.

      • gnu@lemmy.zip
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        20 days ago

        The thinking involved in driving a manual is very minimal once you get used to it, so I reckon any safety issues caused by that would be outweighed by a reduction in the unfortunately common situation of unintended acceleration crashes. You are lot less likely to drive through the nearest wall (or kids) if your instinctual reaction to moving when you should not be is to also go for the clutch and cut power instead of just pressing harder on the wrong pedal.

      • RBWells@lemmy.world
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        20 days ago

        I taught my kids to drive using an automatic transmission, then once they were good at handling traffic, and all the more difficult parts of driving I let whoever wanted to learn to drive my stick shift. But I personally feel safer, not less safe, when I have to pay attention to operating the car, and as things stand now, think it makes me a better driver - that may not matter once cars are more advanced but for now, with driver-operated cars, stick shift is the right level of engagement for me to not get distracted. I do hate shifting motorcycles though, because I am not as familiar with it and it makes me feel less safe. Which is how I imagine OP feels.

      • 0ops@lemm.ee
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        20 days ago

        See this is so alien to me because I’ve been exclusively driving a manual my entire adult life and I don’t think about it. No more than I think about which pedal is the gas, which is the brake, and which direction the car goes when I turn the wheel this way. I just drive.

      • Delphia@lemmy.world
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        20 days ago

        Nope. You dont enjoy driving, by your own admission arent good at it but want to deprive people who are good at it of their options.

        If your crap in bed do I have to stick to missionary for the rest of my life too?

          • Cypher@lemmy.world
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            19 days ago

            Automatic should be the only option

            Because you seem to be incapable of recalling what you said.

            You are being called out for having zero knowledge and then declaring what should be allowed.

            • Platypus@lemmings.worldOP
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              19 days ago

              Is literally one less big distraction on the road dude, yeah after I dunno how many hundreds of hours becomes less of a problem but it is now

  • Jo Miran@lemmy.ml
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    21 days ago

    With enough practice, driving becomes second nature to the point that you don’t really think about it. This goes triple for manual transmission cars because you have so much control over the behaviour of the vehicle that it almost feels.like.an extension of yourself. The learning curve is a pain but the payoff is worth it.

    • blackbrook@mander.xyz
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      20 days ago

      It’s really hard to imagine when you are trying to learn. You just have to trust it will happen. You are basically training unconscious parts of your brain, and at some point all the hardness just vanishes and some unconscious part of your brain just magically does all the hard stuff for you without you thinking about it.

  • Tywèle [she|her]@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    21 days ago

    Where do you live that you HAVE to learn manual? Here in Germany you have a choice of either learning manual or automatic. If you learn automatic though you are only allowed to drive automatic cars and if you learn manual you are allowed to drive both.

    • Platypus@lemmings.worldOP
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      21 days ago

      You’re basically forced, there’s the option, sure but nobody takes it because for all jobs and stuff EVERYONE uses manual, so you shouldn’t even bother

      Also my family is not rich, I can’t afford a car so I would have to use the only car they have, an old fiat, manual obviously

  • Anivia@feddit.org
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    20 days ago

    It becomes easy with practice, and driving a manual is not distracting at all once you get the hang of it

    • Corkyskog@sh.itjust.works
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      20 days ago

      I think the roads would be safer everybody drove a manual. It makes it harder for drivers to do other things and be distracted.

      • Anivia@feddit.org
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        20 days ago

        Not really, most people here in Germany drive a manual and it doesn’t stop them from using their phone while driving

  • Hegar@fedia.io
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    19 days ago

    Yep! In my experience it’s awful and it stays awful for ever.

    But just like with going to work, over time you come to accept that existence is suffering.

  • 🐍🩶🐢@lemmy.world
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    20 days ago

    I don’t have much experience with manual, but I do have severe ADHD. From my experience, it takes about 6 months of driving every day before your brain does most of it automatically. It is really awful at first having to constantly think about every step. Couple random anecdotes that may help. My assumption is you are driving on the right:

    1. Drive barefoot or with minimalist shoes. You can really feel the car and road this way. Flip flops are a no no. All it took was them getting caught in the pedal once to never do it again.
    2. Leave lots of space in front of you in high traffic situations. If you are sitting in the far right/exit/slow lane a lot it will help other drivers get around you. If it is a mulilane highway, it may be safer to stay in the middle lane until it is time to exit.
    3. Look left first. Oncoming traffic hitting your driver side door is bad.
    4. If you ever ever doubt when looking both ways, just look again. People can wait.
    5. People get mad or do stupid shit. It is ok. We stop being rational people once “time” enters the equation. At some point, getting mad at other drivers all the time makes you a worse driver. Learn to just let shit go.
    6. Try to space yourself where you don’t create blindspots for yourself or others.
    7. Position your side mirrors properly. If you can easily see you car door, they are pointing in too far.

    Adjust your seat and steering wheel. You want the steering wheel far away from your face. If you have an adjustable steering wheel, this will be a lot easier. There is a little lever you can pull to unlock it.

    1. Unlatch the wheel and push it completely away from you.
    2. Adjust your seat first so you can reach the pedals and feel in control of run. Test how it feels to push the brake, clutch, etc.
    3. Now, adjust the steering wheel. Put your arms straight out. You want your wrists to touch the “10&2” position of the wheel.
    4. Keep the steering wheel as low as you can, but still see the instruments, and make sure there is plenty of space between you and the very deadly airbag. You do not want it hitting your face and it needs enough space to deploy to properly protect you
    5. Make final adjustments as needed and recheck your mirrors.
      • 🐍🩶🐢@lemmy.world
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        20 days ago

        Ah, so I really did mean the 10 & 2 for figuring out that positioning of the seat/wheel only. I absolutely agree that 10&2 is a terrible position for driving. 9&3 is much better.

        I read an article a while back on how to position the wheel, as it is especially a problem for women. Airbags can absolutely kill you and I spent some time readjusting everything to make sure the airbag would not deploy in my face or too close to my chest. Adjusting the seatbelt height thing is also really important, but with breasts the damn thing still drifts to where it shouldn’t. Just not as bad.

        Absolutely check with the women in your life about this as a lot of us don’t think about it until we get in an accident and the airbag and seatbelt do more damage than the crash. I am lucky I have only had a minor crash once with no airbag deployed. There are ways to get pedals adjusted by the dealership or swapped with longer ones. I assume mechanics can probably do it too, but I personally do not know how that all works.

  • rumschlumpel@feddit.org
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    21 days ago

    Hard to say without knowing details. How’s the traffic in your area, is it a big city or more rural? What country?

  • jjjalljs@ttrpg.network
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    20 days ago

    No, it’s not awful all the time. Cruising down a highway or familiar streets can be kind of zen. I say this as someone who despises car-culture and believes most transit should be mass, public, transit options like buses and trains. But I have fond memories of cruising down the highway at night by myself singing along with my favorite music.

    I live somewhere that’s walkable and has a subway system now, and it’s much better. Don’t have to worry about parking, insurance, fuel, drinking too much. So if you really hate driving, you could look into living somewhere that doesn’t require it.

    • Platypus@lemmings.worldOP
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      20 days ago

      The whole “living somewhere else” is not a reality for me, I already live somewhere else and I’m broke

  • DirigibleProtein@aussie.zone
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    20 days ago

    Like anything else, the more you practice, the better you get. I remember how much anxiety and stress I had when I was learning; now I don’t even think about it.

    Could you get a friend or relative to take you out to a quiet area to get more practice away from traffic and other road users? Then slowly build up to more stressful situations. I was taking my kids a few times a week around the quieter back streets, round and round and round, until they got their confidence up, then we went out to small roads with traffic, and built up until they were driving on busy main roads and freeways.

    Here in Australia, you can choose to get an automatic-only license and not have to learn manual. Is that an option where you are?

    • Platypus@lemmings.worldOP
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      20 days ago

      Is an option… That nobody, especially poor people, takes. I’m doing this only because I’m unemployed, having a driving licence should raise my chances. Everyone, in every type of job, uses manual cars here. The only car I would have access is a manual car. There’s no point for me on going for auto

  • TeckFire@lemmy.world
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    21 days ago

    As someone who drives an automatic, I so wish I could have a manual. I much prefer driving them.

    Don’t get me wrong, I’m really glad I was able to drive an automatic and get experience first, but once you start really driving a car, you realize how much an automatic limits you. Things like engine braking, coasting, and honestly just staying in one consistent gear when you’re trying to maintain good speed control are much harder, if not next to impossible depending on the automatic.

    Learning to drive is going to take a lot of time though, and the fact that everyone just does it and takes it for granted I think really messes with you. Speaking from experience, most people don’t even learn to drive that well, no matter how much they drive. I see people constantly driving off the lines, poor speed control, braking distance, etc. just blows my mind that where I live (USA) there’s next to no requirements to drive.

    • Platypus@lemmings.worldOP
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      21 days ago

      I wish that here would work like it works there, next to no requirements. You don’t even need turning lights that much there right? Also majority uses auto, one less thing to think. I don’t even want to take a highway. I want to stay under 70 kph roads

    • Platypus@lemmings.worldOP
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      21 days ago

      Dude, the difference is that with a game nothing happens when you fuck up. I can mess with it All I want. That’s just not possible on the road in any way.

      • Mushroomm@sh.itjust.works
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        21 days ago

        Go to a parking lot and frig around till you get it? I mean e brake turns and slipping and sliding in icy parking lots in winter is how most good drivers get good. In order to be safe accidentally out of control, you’ve got to experience what that feels like in a safe, intentional way.

        This also removes a bit of the fear factor and anxiety which imo cause as much or more accidents than anything else. Most friends I have that aren’t great drivers are scared of driving. Thanks to their fears and indecision, they’ve got more accidents and fender benders than anyone.

        Confidence is key.

  • Uranium 🟩@sh.itjust.works
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    21 days ago

    Oh wow, you must learn manual, that’s ridiculous! Where in the world is that?

    I’ve not started yet, but I’m going to learn automatic when I go to learn, my GF has been learning manual for over 2 years because her dad and our friend who drives said that it makes the most sense to, when in reality that’s just because of what they were told based on outdated advice.

    She even has an automatic waiting for her once she finally passes, but she’s stubborn and doesn’t want to switch to learning automatic, it’s really frustrating how stubborn she is about not giving up or approaching it from another direction.

    She has dyslexia and the British Dyslexic Association even recommends that dyslexics learn automatic as it’s a known thing they struggle with. She even had to write L and R on her hands, bless her.

    I’ve heard some people benefit from intensive driving courses, where you do like 2 solid weeks of lessons then take the test, but no clue if they have those in your country

    I’ve suggested to her, if she really wants a manual licence then get the automatic licence, then decide if she really wants the manual, as she’ll be more comfortable with roads and driving and can just focus on the manual aspect

    • Platypus@lemmings.worldOP
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      21 days ago

      Is not like you MUST TO LEARN MANUAL. But go ahead and try to find a job with only automatic cars being used or try find a cheap 3000 euro manual car for yourself. Nobody uses them here except rich families or companies, AKA not my world.

  • BearOfaTime@lemm.ee
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    21 days ago

    Omg, stop whining. Do or do not, there is no try. If you don’t want to drive, then why are you doing this?

    Driving is one of the easiest things you’ll ever do in life (wspeckally with cars built after about 1990).

    If learning how to drive is this difficult for you, what are you going to do when something truly difficult comes along?

    Being car free is totally possible.

    Lol, OK, you do you.

    • Platypus@lemmings.worldOP
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      21 days ago

      Because I have basically no choice. I don’t enjoy it but I need a job. Almost no one in family has a licence. You can’t just determine what’s easy or difficult for everyone. My mom can’t drive either and can barely go on a bicycle, is she stupid or less of a human being according to you?